A treatise against pants-sagging (or, "don't hang your vagina out, ladies")

Trigger warning: discussion of male and female rape scenarios within.

When I first started at college way back in the day, they held a Rape Awareness Seminar - as is, I think, the norm these days. The bulk of the seminar was focused on "she's never asking for it," and after the presentation section was over, the floor was opened for discussion.

I will never forget this for as long as I live. One guy raised his hand to say - and I quote - "I'm all for equality of the sexes and everything, but if a chick is walking around in a miniskirt, like, with her vagina hanging out? Then yeah, she's totally asking to get raped." I am proud to say that there was an immediate uproar, and although he was allowed to say his piece, he was pretty well shut down by the end of the day.

For some ungodly reason, I was making my breakfast spaghetti this morning and this guy's words came to mind.

Now, let's dispose of the obvious "what a douche" and "let's throw this guy off a cliff" and "how does a vagina HANG OUT?" reactions for a minute, and assume that everything that this guy said is absolutely correct.

Here we go.

Here is the first given: Chicks who walk around with their vaginas hanging out are totally asking to get raped.

Here is the second given: The first given has something to do with the equality of the sexes.

Now, the "equality of the sexes" thing leads me to believe that the first given should apply to men on the same level as it applies to women, right? So, if a man (or, to use the proper contextual vernacular, a "bro") is walking around with his penis hanging out, he's asking to get raped. Makes sense.

But hang on a minute. It's very much possible to rape a man's penis, but (judging by reported incidents, natch) it's far more common for men to be raped in a penetration-scenario.

Let's go ahead and eliminate oral rape only for the sake of this argument, since men and women let their mouths hang out with equal frequency, and thus, the asking-to-get-raped factor is a constant there.

That only leaves one logistically probable method of rape - the behind. Yes, ears and noses and bellybuttons are possible, but that's another discussion altogether. 

So, anal rape is the possibility that's really left over for men. Thus, it stands to reason that if a bro walks around with his ass hanging out, he's totally asking to get raped. After all, if men can't control their rape-urges around vagina-dangling women, how can they possibly control those same urges around ass-dangling men? They are definitely asking for it.

And yet. Sagging of pants (which tends to leave the behind in an undeniably provocative position) is considered a display of thug-life masculinity. A plumbers crack? Well, it tends to be embarrassing, but it's generally just considered humorous. I have never once heard someone say "oh, that guy was sagging his pants? He was begging to get raped!"

No matter how much a pants-sagging bro has had to drink, he's not asking to get raped. If a pants-sagging, intoxicated bro goes up to another bros room, he is not asking to get raped. Even if a pants-sagging, intoxicated bro alone in a bedroom with another bro starts making out with that other bro, he is not. Asking. To get raped.

Replace "pants-sagging" with "scantily clad" and "bro" with "chick," and half of the people reading this blog would probably read those scenarios and think "well, yeah, but come on - she was kind of asking for it, right?"

Why is that? Is it because we consider anal rape to be the purview of pedophiles and prisoners? Is it because we assume that bros will respect the boundaries of other bros, enough so that they won't rape each other? Is it because we assign a level of strength to a non-consenting bro - even if he's drunk or otherwise impaired - that he'll be able to fight off the pursuant bro?

Or maybe it's because we find the whole idea - that any bro would ever ask to get raped - to be completely and utterly ludicrous.

Now tell me this: if you're all for equality of the sexes - and I can't fathom why you would be reading this of all blogs if you weren't - why would you ever assume that the same idea, but about chicks instead of bros, is reasonable?

Because just like the pants-on-the-ground bro, a chick - whether her vagina is tucked neatly away, or flapping freely in the breeze - is never, ever, ever, totally asking to get raped.

Just a thought.